Numerology/Astrology for 7/9/18

7/9/18 is the number 9. The number 9 asks you the question to see if you are ever really complete? I see so many that decide to be complete but they do it like they are cutting and slicing the person or situation away from themselves. It is a bloody and painful process to observe and even more painful to feel if it is being inflicted upon you. Many years ago I had a moment when a person who I believed I loved deeply was confronted with some huge truths by many others and myself. Fortunately I was not the instigator. It was a sort of intervention and I was dragged into it unknowingly, like a type of pawn in a bigger game. The knowledge was a revelation to myself as to the complexity of the deception that was being done by him to many others (evidently myself included). So all of this was a huge revelation to myself, but in the middle of this entire intervention that was being orchestrated, he lashed out at me. In the shock and amazement of the moment, what was very clear, was that I was an innocent and a victim in the youthful naiveté that one has at 21 years old, I knew for certain that his attack on me was displaced and a clear indication of his inability to navigate such huge truths hitting him all at once. That told me that I was also complete. But I was not angry. I was not upset. I was stunned and a core truth that reflects my life arose in that moment like a lightning bolt of revelation.  And that was that I chose to minimize drama.
Drama is in indication of a soul in denial. A soul without enough clarity, nor a calm mind or an inner centered knowing.
And in that moment I calmly told him that I loved him and that I needed to step back because he clearly had big issues to deal with and it was my choice to not take on his karmic path at this time.
At 21 to be so clean and clear, shocks me to this day.. It was as if a wiser part of myself stepped in and spoke without attachment but only love. Almost 20 years later I saw him at a friend’s funeral and again, I felt clean and detached from him. There was a kindness and affection towards him but no need to be in that energy even 20 years later.
You can karmically detach cleanly and still find completion.
But you cannot do it from anger
or any feeling of running away
or trying to get rid of a feeling.
You often must deal with what you feel.
And the other person must deal with what they feel.
Completion for yourself is not dependent
on getting another to do what you want.
~Suzanne Wagner~

Astrology Today

The Moon continues its transit of practical, patient Taurus until around mid-day when it enters communicative, curious Gemini.

Mercury forms a square to Jupiter this morning, and once again, you wish to seek more meaning in your life. Doing it only externally can lead to exaggeration or misjudgment and is not the best use of this energy. Know that to find meaning in your life you have to find out first who you really are. Seeking externally is not going to help you find that meaning because there is a deeper place that finds satisfaction in knowing who you really are and from there you will naturally find the meaning you are seeking. The external will never satisfy your own heart if your internal self is unexplored and unknown. You are the mystery you seek. Used wisely this energy can manifest big ideas that may very well hold weight at a later date after you figured out how to make the essential refinements.

Allow extra time or decide to start late Monday morning. On Monday, Venus enters Virgo until August 6. This is not an easy combination if you have anyone in your life who is overly critical (just know that some will get more critical than normal). Don’t let another person’s frustration overwhelm your own nervous system. Don’t get caught by their emotional intensity. However, it is a good combination for working on home or office beautification. Make a list and use this energy to accomplish a great deal because of the meticulousness of Venus in Virgo. Venus will be in Virgo for four weeks until August 6th. You may be paying special attention to details and might more thoroughly enjoy the satisfaction of a job well done during this cycle. This is a time when you express your love in more practical ways. Running errands for someone overwhelmed or sick is a good use of this astrology. Just know that it is time for you to be there for those you love. Expression of love needs to make sense and have some sort of purpose with Venus in Virgo. The shadow side of this position is being overly critical, picky, and worrisome. Do your best to let others have their own process. Do not take on that which is not yours to take on.
~Suzanne Wagner~

 

Quote

What is beyond fear?

…..Acceptance
~Suzanne Wagner~

Drama is in indication
of a soul in denial.
A soul without
enough clarity,
nor a calm mind
or an inner centered knowing.
~Suzanne Wagner~

Blog

If you are in denial

My voice will bother you.
If you are holding hate
You will hate my words.

If you are holding self-loathing
My voice will call out to your heart.

If you are refusing to change
You will resist my gifts with all you can muster.

I dreamed that those who wanted to use me
for their own validation of self and personal power

…walked away.

I dreamed that their paths and mine no longer converged
and it was their karmic choice to walk a path
carrying a great burden of suffering further still.

No amount of coaxing could get them
to see the folly of their mind and ego.

No amount of love was enough
because their self-hatred
blocked the very thing
they believed they needed
more than anything from me.

They wanted me to validate
who they were but I cannot validate
a false self to make them
feel good about themselves.

And so our paths diverge.
I watch them go
with an open heart
and a blessing
for their journey
on my lips.

May our paths cross again
in another time and place.

And may the heart centered knowing
within them
guide their way
back home.
~Suzanne Wagner~